An Indian scout leading greenhorns through a mountain pass stops suddenly, raises his hand. He drops to one knee puts his ear to the ground.... Stands and says" buffalo cum"
Greenhorns say" amazing can you hear them or feel the ground shake?"
Indian reply" no ear all sticky"
 
If a plane crashed on the US/Canada border where would they bury the survivors???

You don't bury survivors
 
If a plane crashed on the US/Canada border where would they bury the survivors???

You don't bury survivors
You dont. Living in toronto and ny etc i have heard this a mill times..[emoji12] [emoji14] [emoji124] [emoji124] [emoji124] [emoji149] [emoji124]
 
True story but funny as hell. While building the new USM bioscience building a few years ago the rebar foreman was checking out a smoking hot chick walking across campus. Apparently there is a 3 second staring rule there. Well he looked for well over three seconds. An older professional looking lady came over and said something to him about it. Without missing a beat he looked at her as sober faced as a minister and said ma'am I wasn't staring, I didn't have enough skin left over to blink. Needless to say everyone within earshot of that conversation was rolling on the ground laughing. The lady that came over was completely disgusted and had nothing more to say.
 
Two Aussie priests are in a bathroom using the urinals. One of them looks at the other one's penis and notices there's a Nicoderm patch on it. He laughs and says,'I believe you're supposed to put that patch on your arm or shoulder, not your penis.' The other one replies, 'It's working just fine. I'm down to two butts a day.'
 
Went to my first Muslim birthday party last week.
The musical chairs was a bit slow, but bugger me, pass the parcel was quick!!!
 
Two Aussie priests are in a bathroom using the urinals. One of them looks at the other one's penis and notices there's a Nicoderm patch on it. He laughs and says,'I believe you're supposed to put that patch on your arm or shoulder, not your penis.' The other one replies, 'It's working just fine. I'm down to two butts a day.'
Nice!!
 
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