Live Stoner Chat Live Stoner Chat - Apr-Jun '22

[Suki]

In other news, hormones plus some deeply unsettling dreams and a (not so) healthy dose of "you're a failure" from my mom has my anxiety through the fucking roof and I've been on the verge of/in tears for a good half hour or so now. Hubby got the cacti done while I was gone to get #3 from dance, but he wants to give them a week or so before we backfill the top layer with the lava rocks.

 

[Bill.de.Cat]

Water changed in the rose cane containers. Won't be long till actual roots show I think.

And the 1 survivor of my winter rooting try is putting out new growth.

Gonna have to build a little trellis for it soon.

 

[Suki]

It's taken me a long time but I've come to the understanding now that there is no such thing as being "good enough" when you're measuring success on vastly different scales.

 

[Bill.de.Cat]

It's taken me a long time but I've come to the understanding now that there is no such thing as being "good enough" when you're measuring success on vastly different scales.

As long as your good enough for you, the rest don't really matter.

 

[Lil Dab]

Busy busy finally sat down for a smoke break and got caught up Here's the Seed stocker OD girls

Apollo Black cherry and mack & crack day 7

 

[Weedname]

PTSD is a bitch. Being in a wide open space instead of somewhere where I can see everyone around me is super anxiety inducing. Also, going into a space primarily filled with men as a woman alone is uncomfortable as well. I don't care enough to put that kind of money into a home gym or whatever and also I'd rather use my limited space for things I actually get enjoyment from.

I also got that, severe PTSD, HSP, ADHD and asperger/autism. But I’m learning new ways to handle it almost every day.

You also need time for yourself, and get tired if you are around a lot of other people and noice? Your symptoms fits on me but I’m a dude, lol.

Have you found any weed that makes you forget the PTSD?

 

[Suki]

As long as your good enough for you, the rest don't really matter.

It really truly comes down to a difference in values. My family equates success to status and wealth, while my vision of success for my kids is for them to be mentally healthy and living a life that brings them joy.

Like apologies for prioritizing my kids' mental health, happiness, and encouraging them to follow their passions over their future status in a capitalistic society that may or may not even exist as it does now in another decade or two. Sorry that I see value in them regardless of if they meet your arbitrary standards of where they "should be by now" instead of berating them for not being good enough or working to their potential. You'd think they'd see the wisdom in my doing things differently considering how much they fucked me up, but how dare I refuse to carry on their cycle of generational trauma and instead focus on raising emotionally intelligent humans who want to work collaboratively and help heal our deeply broken society.

Brought to you by my mother's tirade about how #3 needs to be in speech therapy because she can't understand her (which is most definitely because she doesn't listen) and how she needs to be in intensive reading help of some kind because she "doesn't read well" (aka has no interest in books with topics that aren't relevant to what she's interested in and gets majorly anxious when put on the spot). All of which to say that I'm not good enough/doing enough as a mother to make sure #3 will be successful ($$$) as an adult.

 

[Suki]

I like how she can spend less than 10 hours a month with them and act all high and mighty like she knows the first thing about them or what is good for them.

 

[Suki]

I also got that, severe PTSD, HSP, ADHD and asperger/autism. But I’m learning new ways to handle it almost every day.

You also need time for yourself, and get tired if you are around a lot of other people and noice? Your symptoms fits on me but I’m a dude, lol.

Have you found any weed that makes you forget the PTSD?

PTSD is a physical change in the neuropathways in your brain. So, not so much an issue of forgetting about it, but mitigating symptoms. Mostly I try to avoid triggers (which can be tricky when they pop up randomly at times without you realizing they will be an issue) and focus on doing things that bring me peace.

 

[Bill.de.Cat]

A lot of families like that, mine included...reason I'm in Florida and they all back in Mizery...talk to 1 sister about once a month....screw the rest. Leads to a much happier existence for me.