funny shizzle guys! 
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- Nosey buggers!
I've had my supper and you'll never sniff my stash out again(not after last time
) ...I shifted it !
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Wanna bet, nose like a customs & border patrol dog me. Cupboard under the stairs. In a baccy tin under the yellow pages. Am I right ?
And judging by the whiff from the toilet, you had a prawn vindaloo last night. And a Keema Stuffed Nann bread. Bet that stung !
And judging by the whiff from the toilet, you had a prawn vindaloo last night. And a Keema Stuffed Nann bread. Bet that stung !
A blind bloke walks into a shoe shop, picks up his guide dog, and starts spinning around his head. The assistant asks him, 'can I help you sir', blind bloke says, 'no, I'm just having a look around' 
He walks out the shop and the dog promptly pisses up his leg, then man reaches in his pocket and gives the dog a biscuit. A passer by says, 'that dog pissed up your leg and you give him a biscuit?' 'Yeah' says the blind bloke, 'now I know where his mouth is I can kick him in the bollocks'
He walks out the shop and the dog promptly pisses up his leg, then man reaches in his pocket and gives the dog a biscuit. A passer by says, 'that dog pissed up your leg and you give him a biscuit?' 'Yeah' says the blind bloke, 'now I know where his mouth is I can kick him in the bollocks'
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14 year old Billy gets up at 3 am to go to the bathroom, he walks past his parent’s bedroom and sees his Dad doing Mum Doggy-style because they left the door open.
Dad sees him, gives him a wink and a grin carries on rogering Mum.
3 Nights later Dad gets up and walks past Grandma's door which is open, he gets the shock of his life when he sees Billy banging Grandma.
"WHAT THE FU@K BILLY he screams!
Billy replies
"Not so fuckin funny when it's YOUR MUM is it?".
Dad sees him, gives him a wink and a grin carries on rogering Mum.
3 Nights later Dad gets up and walks past Grandma's door which is open, he gets the shock of his life when he sees Billy banging Grandma.
"WHAT THE FU@K BILLY he screams!
Billy replies
"Not so fuckin funny when it's YOUR MUM is it?".
A Scottish farmer is walking through his land, and see's a man bending down trying to drink from a manky water hole.
In thick Scottish brogue, the farmer says 'dunny drink the water, it's manky, a sheep died in there last week'
I'm sorry old boy' says the drinker, 'I can't understand a word your saying'
'Oh, your from England' says the farmer, 'I was trying to tell you to cup your hand, you'll get more water that way'
In thick Scottish brogue, the farmer says 'dunny drink the water, it's manky, a sheep died in there last week'
I'm sorry old boy' says the drinker, 'I can't understand a word your saying'
'Oh, your from England' says the farmer, 'I was trying to tell you to cup your hand, you'll get more water that way'