When Jane first met Tarzan in the jungle, she was instantly attracted to him and during her questions about his life, she asked him if he had ever had sex. "Tarzan not know sex." he replied.
Jane explained to him what it was.
Tarzan said, "Ohhh...Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree."
Horrified, Jane said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly."
She took off her clothing and lay down on the ground.
"Here." she said, pointing to her privates. "You must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loin cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer to her and kicked her right in the crotch!
Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity.
Eventually, she managed to gasp for air and screamed, "What did you do that for?!"
Tarzan replied, "Check for squirrel."
...oh woe is meeeee (only got a draw at Rochdale ffs! 
). 
noooooh, no more Bogata!! 
..... you got me flat-footed chum, and I keep forgetting them! ...I did see something close to this, a perfect Family quote from Peter,... next time you want to get slapped in 0.04sec around women: *(think phonetically here)* --- "... you're overreacting Lois, and everybody knows you can't spell "overrreact' without "ovary!" 
... haven't had the balls to try it yet!! 
