I hate my inlaws so much for how horrible they are to my wife.
My wife is her dad's from a previous marriage. Her step mom came into her life when she was around 10.
For years I've felt like her step mom was actively trying to push her out of the family.
Her dad had a stroke, and then brain surgery a few years ago, so the step mom runs and controls everything.
We pretty much only see them at Christmas. They make no attempt to see us at all.
My wife asked her step mom today if there is any chance they'd watch our girls overnight for our 15th wedding anniversary. My girls will be 13. Literally just need help with making dinner, someone to give them their pills (ADD meds so we have to be super careful with dosing)...and thats about it.
Answer was "Our dogs don't do well with strangers."
So...not only do you not give any sort of a shit about your grandkids, you are basically saying "I treat you like strangers."