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Live Stoner Chat Live Stoner Gossip
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budelee
Colorado Legal Babeeee!!!
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- a Little Dab 'll Do Ya.ask Elvis !!
Arrr ye scurvy wenches best be-a smiling the high tides of the sixth moon of the second quarter have been sent forth,,,arrrrr...I don't know what the hell I just said but Happy Wednesday.....hoist the mast !!!
Morning Stoners! You lot are crazy! Just dyin to have a good party are ya? Then Party on you scurvy dogs. I'm off to swab the decks and will be about later today. Will be working on another "limited edition" Pirate Party badge later, for you all needing the treasure for the weekend, so I will let ya know when its ready and how to get it!!
HashMaster
In Dog Beers I've Only Had One
Ummm... I hate to tell you but I'm pretty sure you just asked eP to go for a romantic stroll on the beach in the moonlight....
Duckster
Still Just a Rat in a Cage
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Morning stoners - a chuckle for the day.
Tim decided to tie the knot with his longtime girlfriend.
One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some loads for an upcoming hunt.
His wife was standing there at the bench watching him.
After a long period of silence she finally speaks.
"Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married I think it's time you quit hunting, shooting,
Hand loading, and fishing. Maybe you should sell your guns and boat."
Tim gets this horrified look on his face.
She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"
"There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife."
"Ex-wife!", she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"
"I wasn't."
Tim decided to tie the knot with his longtime girlfriend.
One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some loads for an upcoming hunt.
His wife was standing there at the bench watching him.
After a long period of silence she finally speaks.
"Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married I think it's time you quit hunting, shooting,
Hand loading, and fishing. Maybe you should sell your guns and boat."
Tim gets this horrified look on his face.
She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"
"There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife."
"Ex-wife!", she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"
"I wasn't."
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Let me translate it for ye me hearty.
Arrr - how a pirate agrees or is in fine form.
Scurvy - lack of vitamin C, a case of the rickets, bow legged ye be.
Wenches - young woman/prostitutes. Grrrrr(slaps the bend in your arm whilst making a fist with the other)!
Best be-a smiling - in an agreeable mood/happy (possibly full of grog).
Sixth moon of the second quarter - the last moon of the sixth month (one full moon per month,each quarter is three months, so a total of six full moons in a six month period).
Sent forth - To have produced, born,yielded. (so if the six moon has been sent forth , we be in June).
Arrr - how a pirate agrees or is in fine form.
Hoist the mast - well matey you must be a ship builder to do that, hoist the mast into position. Otherwise you be hoisting the sail yo ho.
I hope that makes sense to thee?
A happy Wednesday be with ye me hearty
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The basics how to talk Pirate
Pirate lingo is rich and complicated, sort of like a good stew.
But if you just want a quick fix, a surface gloss, a "pirate patina," if you will, here are the five basic words that you cannot live without.
Ahoy! - "Hello!"
Avast! - Stop and give attention. It can be used in a sense of surprise, "Whoa! Get a load of that!" which today makes it more of a "Check it out" or "No way!" or "Get off!"
Aye! - "Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did."
Aye aye! - "I'll get right on that sir, as soon as my break is over."
Arrr! - This one is often confused with arrrgh, which is of course the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. "Arrr!" can mean, variously, "yes," "I agree," "I'm happy," "I'm enjoying this beer," "My team is going to win it all," "I saw that television show, it sucked!" and "That was a clever remark you or I just made." And those are just a few of the myriad possibilities of Arrr!
Advanced pirate lingo; or On beyond “Aarrr!”
Once you've mastered the basics, you're ready to start expanding your pirate vocabulary. Try these for starters
Beauty – The best possible pirate address for a woman. Always preceded by “me,” as in, “C’mere, me beauty,” or even, “me buxom beauty,” to one particularly well endowed. You’ll be surprised how effective this is.
Bilge rat – The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It’s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. On TLAP Day – A lot of guy humor involves insulting your buddies to prove your friendship. It’s important that everyone understand you are smarter, more powerful and much luckier with the wenches than they are. Since bilge rat is a pretty dirty thing to call someone, by all means use it on your friends.
Bung hole – Victuals on a ship were stored in wooden casks. The stopper in the barrel is called the bung, and the hole is called the bung hole. That’s all. It sounds a lot worse, doesn’t it? On TLAP Day – When dinner is served you’ll make quite an impression when you say, “Well, me hearties, let’s see what crawled out of the bung hole.” That statement will be instantly followed by the sound of people putting down their utensils and pushing themselves away from the table. Great! More for you!
Grog – An alcoholic drink, usually rum diluted with water, but in this context you could use it to refer to any alcoholic beverage other than beer, and we aren’t prepared to be picky about that, either. Call your beer grog if you want. We won’t stop you! Water aboard ship was stored for long periods in slimy wooden barrels, so you can see why rum was added to each sailor’s water ration – to kill the rancid taste. On TLAP Day – Drink up, me hearties! And call whatever you’re drinking grog if you want to. If some prissy pedant purses his lips and protests the word grog can only be used if drinking rum and water, not the Singapore Sling you’re holding, keelhaul him!
Hornpipe – Both a single-reeded musical instrument sailors often had aboard ship, and a spirited dance that sailors do. On TLAP Day – We are not big fans of the capering, it’s not our favorite art form, if you will, so we don’t have a lot to say on the subject, other than to observe that the common term for being filled with lust is “horny,” and hornpipe then has some comical possibilities. “Is that a hornpipe in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? Or both?”
Lubber – (or land lubber) This is the seaman’s version of land lover, mangled by typical pirate disregard for elocution. A lubber is someone who does not go to sea, who stays on the land. On TLAP Day – More likely than not, you are a lubber 364 days of the year. But not if you’re talking like a pirate! Then the word lubber becomes one of the more fierce weapons in your arsenal of piratical lingo. In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is ALWAYS an insult.
Smartly – Do something quickly. On TLAP Day – “Smartly, me lass,” you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.
Top Ten Pickup lines
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup lineS
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Bonus pickup lines (when the ones above don't work, as they often won't)
They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
Wanna shiver me timbers?
I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
Brwaack! Polly want a cracker? … Oh, wait. That’s for Talk Like a PARROT Day.
That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Let's get together and haul some keel.
That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.
Top Ten Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates
By popular demand ...
10. What are YOU doing here?
9. Is that a belayin' pin in yer britches, or are ye ... (this one is never completed)
8. Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
7. So, tell me, why do they call ye, "Cap'n Feathersword?"
6. That's quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
5. Aye, I guarantee ye, I've had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice ratio!"
4. I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
3. C'mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
2. RAMMING SPEED!
...and the number one Female Pirate Pick-up Line:
1. You. Pants Off. Now!
Some more Pirate words for ye
Top 10 Pirate Phrases and Sayings:
1. Arrrrgh, swab the poop deck lest ye be pooped upon
2. The wench or the booty or the wench with the booty, you're call
3. Walk the plank you scallywag and join Davy Jones' Locker
4. I got ye buried treasure right here pal
5. Spit it out! Me parrot's a better talker than you.
6. This is not me wooden leg. This is me Spaniard stomper.
7. Tickle me timbers and I'll be yours forever
8. Find me Mike Tyson as I'm gonna whack him with me left hook
9. I hear me booty calling
10. Me treasure map is in me pants. Who here will get it?
Pirate lingo is rich and complicated, sort of like a good stew.
But if you just want a quick fix, a surface gloss, a "pirate patina," if you will, here are the five basic words that you cannot live without.
Ahoy! - "Hello!"
Avast! - Stop and give attention. It can be used in a sense of surprise, "Whoa! Get a load of that!" which today makes it more of a "Check it out" or "No way!" or "Get off!"
Aye! - "Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did."
Aye aye! - "I'll get right on that sir, as soon as my break is over."
Arrr! - This one is often confused with arrrgh, which is of course the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. "Arrr!" can mean, variously, "yes," "I agree," "I'm happy," "I'm enjoying this beer," "My team is going to win it all," "I saw that television show, it sucked!" and "That was a clever remark you or I just made." And those are just a few of the myriad possibilities of Arrr!
Advanced pirate lingo; or On beyond “Aarrr!”
Once you've mastered the basics, you're ready to start expanding your pirate vocabulary. Try these for starters
Beauty – The best possible pirate address for a woman. Always preceded by “me,” as in, “C’mere, me beauty,” or even, “me buxom beauty,” to one particularly well endowed. You’ll be surprised how effective this is.
Bilge rat – The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It’s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. On TLAP Day – A lot of guy humor involves insulting your buddies to prove your friendship. It’s important that everyone understand you are smarter, more powerful and much luckier with the wenches than they are. Since bilge rat is a pretty dirty thing to call someone, by all means use it on your friends.
Bung hole – Victuals on a ship were stored in wooden casks. The stopper in the barrel is called the bung, and the hole is called the bung hole. That’s all. It sounds a lot worse, doesn’t it? On TLAP Day – When dinner is served you’ll make quite an impression when you say, “Well, me hearties, let’s see what crawled out of the bung hole.” That statement will be instantly followed by the sound of people putting down their utensils and pushing themselves away from the table. Great! More for you!
Grog – An alcoholic drink, usually rum diluted with water, but in this context you could use it to refer to any alcoholic beverage other than beer, and we aren’t prepared to be picky about that, either. Call your beer grog if you want. We won’t stop you! Water aboard ship was stored for long periods in slimy wooden barrels, so you can see why rum was added to each sailor’s water ration – to kill the rancid taste. On TLAP Day – Drink up, me hearties! And call whatever you’re drinking grog if you want to. If some prissy pedant purses his lips and protests the word grog can only be used if drinking rum and water, not the Singapore Sling you’re holding, keelhaul him!
Hornpipe – Both a single-reeded musical instrument sailors often had aboard ship, and a spirited dance that sailors do. On TLAP Day – We are not big fans of the capering, it’s not our favorite art form, if you will, so we don’t have a lot to say on the subject, other than to observe that the common term for being filled with lust is “horny,” and hornpipe then has some comical possibilities. “Is that a hornpipe in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? Or both?”
Lubber – (or land lubber) This is the seaman’s version of land lover, mangled by typical pirate disregard for elocution. A lubber is someone who does not go to sea, who stays on the land. On TLAP Day – More likely than not, you are a lubber 364 days of the year. But not if you’re talking like a pirate! Then the word lubber becomes one of the more fierce weapons in your arsenal of piratical lingo. In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is ALWAYS an insult.
Smartly – Do something quickly. On TLAP Day – “Smartly, me lass,” you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.
Top Ten Pickup lines
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup lineS
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Bonus pickup lines (when the ones above don't work, as they often won't)
They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
Wanna shiver me timbers?
I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
Brwaack! Polly want a cracker? … Oh, wait. That’s for Talk Like a PARROT Day.
That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Let's get together and haul some keel.
That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.
Top Ten Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates
By popular demand ...
10. What are YOU doing here?
9. Is that a belayin' pin in yer britches, or are ye ... (this one is never completed)
8. Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
7. So, tell me, why do they call ye, "Cap'n Feathersword?"
6. That's quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
5. Aye, I guarantee ye, I've had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice ratio!"
4. I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
3. C'mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
2. RAMMING SPEED!
...and the number one Female Pirate Pick-up Line:
1. You. Pants Off. Now!
Some more Pirate words for ye
- All hands hoay=Everyone get on the deck
- Avast ye=Pay attention
- Black spot=Death threat
- Dance the hempen jig=To hang someone
- Dungbie=Rear end
- Hempen halter=The noose used to hang people
- Hornswaggle=To cheat
- Shiver me timbers=An expression used to show shock or disbelief
- Abaft=Back area of the boat
- Binnacle=Where the compass is kept on board the ship
- Cackle fruit=Chicken eggs
- Coaming=A surface that prevented water on the deck from dripping to lower levels of the ship
- Duffle=A sailor's belongings
- Head=Toilet on board the ship
- Holystone=Sandstone that was used to scrub the ships
- Jacob's Ladder=Rope ladder that was used to climb aboard ships
- Monkey=Small cannon
- Monkey jacket=Short jacket worn by some of those aboard the ship
- Orlop=Deck where cables are stored away
- Poop deck=Deck that is the highest and farthest back
- Cockswain=The helmsman
- Flibustier=Pirates of the Golden Age
- Freebooter=Refers to an actual pirate
- Landlubber=A person who is not incredibly skilled at sea
- Powder monkey=A gunner's assistant
- Black jack=Large drinking cups
- Davy Jones' Locker=Refers to death
- Ahoy=Hello
- Ahoy, matey=Hello, friend
- Batten down the hatches=A signal to prepare the ship for an upcoming storm
- Blimey!=Something said when one is in a state of surprise
- Blow the man down=A command which means to kill somebody
- Booty=Treasure
- Buccaneer=Name for a pirate
- Crow's nest=The place on the ship where the lookout stand is built
- Cutlass=Type of sword used by the pirates
- Feed the fish=Meaning that an individual or group of individuals will soon die
- Heave ho=Instruction to put some strength into whatever one is doing
- Jolly Roger=The famous pirate flag with a skull and crossbones on it
- Man-O-War=The name used for a pirate ship that is all set and ready to go to war
- Old salt=A sailor that has a great deal of experience on the seas
- Privateer=Pirates who are sponsored by the government
- Scallywag=A name that is used as an insult to someone
- Scuttle=To sink a ship
- Seadog=An old sailor or pirate
- Shark bait=Going to die soon
- Thar she blows!=An expression used when a whale is spotted from the ship
- Son of a biscuit eater=An insult
- Three sheets to the wind=Someone who is quite drunk
- Walk the plank=A punishment which entails someone who walks over the side of the ship off of the plank. Their hands are often tied so that they cannot swim and they drowned.
- Yo Ho Ho=There is often used to express some sort of cheer but also can be used to call attention to the speaker.
Top 10 Pirate Phrases and Sayings:
1. Arrrrgh, swab the poop deck lest ye be pooped upon
2. The wench or the booty or the wench with the booty, you're call
3. Walk the plank you scallywag and join Davy Jones' Locker
4. I got ye buried treasure right here pal
5. Spit it out! Me parrot's a better talker than you.
6. This is not me wooden leg. This is me Spaniard stomper.
7. Tickle me timbers and I'll be yours forever
8. Find me Mike Tyson as I'm gonna whack him with me left hook
9. I hear me booty calling
10. Me treasure map is in me pants. Who here will get it?
HashMaster
In Dog Beers I've Only Had One
But the most important one to know is:
Buxom Wench
I'm no good at describing with words so let's just have a pic shall we ?
And there you have it ....
Buxom Wench
I'm no good at describing with words so let's just have a pic shall we ?
And there you have it ....
Last edited:
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