Hi, and sorry to hear about your problem. Almost everything you have done sounds fine to me, there is nothing wrong with the coco/perlite mix, provided it was buffered, your EC's are fine, and I guarantee that there is nothing wrong with the Autopot system itself. My first grow with autopots was excellent with a coco mix similar to yours, although I used ~60/40 coco perlite throughout the pots, with no airdome.
I second
@Mañ'O'Green's suspicion about the gravel. Importantly, washing/buffering it may not cure the problem. If it is the wrong type of rock, the slightly acidic nute mix could result in it releasing stuff that could cause lockout. Did you use this stuff in your hand watered grows? Did you use it in both autopot grows? If you used it for the first time in both autopot attempts, it may be your problem. Some types of rocks out there bugger with both your nute mix and the pH of your medium. And contrary to some of the advice out there, coarse material like gravel or hydroton at the bottom of autopots is NOT required, and may be harmful. Quite aside from nute or pH effects, the abrupt change in particle size at the boundary of the rocks/hydroton and grow medium interferes with wicking of nutes from the flood zone up into the rest of the pot. As my grow and likely many others demonstrate, a well drained medium is all that is required, all the way to the bottom of the pot. Air domes seem to add little when peeps compare with and without, and they do add complexity and dependence on uninterrupted electricity.
None of which helps you fix the current problem. If no other explanation for the problem emerges with more expert advice, and I were in your boots, I would just call quits on autopot subirrigation for this grow, and top water to significant runoff to finish off. By doing that, you may reduce the influence of the problematic gravel in the bottom of the pot. If all the nutes are not travelling up through the gravel or sitting in it during the flood cycle, whatever mischief it might be causing would at least be reduced if not eliminated. Just a guess on my part, but that is what I would do. And next time, just stick to coco/perlite all the way down, and no air dome. In this case, simple really is good, IMHO. Don't give up on the autopots, they kick serious butt, especially with fabric pots.
Good luck with it, I hope you manage to save the grow.