Live Stoner Chat Things that make you LOL...Pics,Videos,Jokes....

  • Thread starter Thread starter K21701
  • Start date Start date
K

K21701

Guest
CALORIES BURNED DURING SEX!​


REMOVING HER CLOTHES:


With her consent 12 Calories

Without her consent 2,187 Calories


OPENING HER BRA:


With both hands 8 Calories
With one hand 12 Calories

With your teeth 485 Calories


PUTTING ON A CONDOM:

With an erection 6 Calories
Without an erection 3,315 Calories


POSITIONS:

Missionary 12 Calories

69 lying down 78 Calories

69 standing up 812 Calories

Wheelbarrow 216 Calories

Doggy Style 326 Calories

Italian chandelier 2,912 Calories


ORGASMS:


Real 112 Calories

Fake 1,315 Calories



POST ORGASM:

Lying in bed hugging 18 Calories

Getting up immediately 36 Calories

Explaining why you got out of bed immediately 816 Calories


GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:

If you are:

20-29 years 36 Calories

30-39 years 80 Calories

40-49 years 124 Calories

50-59 years 1,972 Calories

60-69 years 7,916 Calories

70 and over Results are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS:

Calmly 32 Calories

In a hurry 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door 5,218 Calories

With your wife knocking at the door 13,521 Calories
 
oke
DO IT YOU ZELF HOW TOO MAKE PIC showing ??


picture.php


owhkee!! sey what?
 
[video=youtube;if27InJBtEI]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=if27InJBtEI[/video] try and not laugh
 
**Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,**​
Phone Ringing

**'Hello?'**

**'Hi honey.**
**This is Daddy.**
**Is Mommy near the phone?'**

**'No, Daddy.**
**She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Gabe.'**

**After a brief pause,**

**Daddy says,**
**'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Gabe.'**


**'Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy,**
**Right now..'**

Brief Pause.

**'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.**
**Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs**
**And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy**
**That Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'**

**'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'**


**A few minutes later**
**The little girl comes back to the phone.**

**'I did it, Daddy.'**

**'And what happened, honey?' **

'Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming.**
**Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser**
**And now she isn't moving at all!'**


**'Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Gabe?'**


**'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.**
**He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window**
**And into the swimming pool.**
**But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water**
**Last week to clean it.**


**He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead.'**



*****Long Pause*****




*****Longer Pause*****



*****Even Longer Pause*****



**Then Daddy says,**


**'Swimming pool? ............**






**Is this 486-5731?'*​
 
Back
Top