Live Stoners Live Stoner Chat - Jan-Mar '22

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Ted loves sitting in the snow....

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Gravy likes to be left unbothered, inside....

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Midgets FREAK ME!
I was 19 and in Chicago bar hopping with a friend that moved back home. We were at a small local bar having a great time. I was LIT and sipping on some FINE single malt Scotch and puffing on a fine Dominican cigar, just chillin'.We had just left this jazz club when it just got too packed for my comfort............some great local artists!
It was a little before last call and I stood up in front of the booth to go to the head before we left, when I got a tap on my leg and an odd feminine voice said, "Hey handsome." I turned and looked, but there was nothing there. "Down here." the odd voice said.
I looked down and there was this pretty and proportionate tiny woman. She was tiny! I was 6ft3in and only about 220lbs then and she barely came much above my belt buckle! She had one of those East Coast blown out late 70's hairdos and beautiful green eyes.......I;m a sucker for green eyes. "Mind if I join you? I've been watching you since you walked in."
I'm shocked, intrigued, stoned, slightly drunk, horny and very emotionally confused. So I offer her a drink and we have some small talk. It was pretty plain what she was there for, but I'm trying to figure out if it was for pay or pleasure. I'm just trippin' in my head with all these conflicting signals in my head. The voice and what was coming out of her mouth, just didn't jive in my head. I've had women throw themselves at me before, most were not hookers too, so that wasn't it! LOL! Her voice was close to a little girl, but kinda oddly automated. It was like a 10-12 yr old coming on to me in my head.
I'm trying to figure out how to get out of this gracefully, not hurt anyone's feelings and no nasty scene being made. The bar tender then hollers 'last call'. This must have been a sign for her to try and close the deal. She then reaches over and grabs my 'package' and squeaks, "Oh my! I could have lots of fun with this!" and licks her lips as she gave me a little squeeze.

Well, that was it! This ain't gonna happen! It might have been a "Dear Penthouse" moment, but this in just too freaky for me. My friend and I had a signal to let the other know when we wanted to leave. I excused myself to go to the head as I was going to do before she walked up. By then, I did have to whizz like a race horse, so I did go to the head as she watched me walk there. Luckily she could see me leave. I waited around the corner for my friend to come out.
About 10 min passed before my friend came out and he was alone. We caught a cab and he told me what happened after I left. He told me she was mad as hell! He said he was trippin on the filth coming from her in that 12yr old voice!!!! She tried to throw her drink at my friend when he made a comment about what she and her little friends do when her Mom lets her have a sleep over! Yeah, he had a mean streak! LOL!

Yeah, I've been scarred fer life!:rofl::rofl::rofl: Those eyes really temped me, but damn!:doh::eek1:

Ok! Enough 'Story Time'!
How is everyone this fine, but cold Sunday?
 
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