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Once upon a time, I was convicted of 7 felonies and 32 misdemeanors, so I went on a 5 prison tour ! Don't chew judge meeh ! I'm retired now and crime free for 12+ years now !

Once upon a time, I got my ass whipped by my dad for stealing his weed when I was a kid, only I didn't do it, and I suspected I knew where it was.....so a year or so later I ran away, returned to the house and broke in....and found the weed and his pipe in the ceiling tiles of his bedroom, just as I suspected !

Once upon a time, when I was just a boy, a late night itch and pat turned into my first full fledged wank session. I was convinced I had broken something when all was said and done, so I went to seek my Dad's counsel in regards to the obviously "permanent" damage I had caused.
I went to my Fathers bedside and rather sheepishly confessed to what I had done. He tried to shoo me off with a quick assurance, but I wouldn't leave....."but Dad what about school" I asked ? He laughed so hard he nearly fell out of bed.

"Buddy if you still have that in the morning :)woody:) your more of a man than I'll ever be, and we will just tape it to your stomach" !

You can't make this shit up !

:crying:

:cheers::thanks::rofl:
no shit, that's a hoot
 
@Autogrowzs
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